I want to talk about being real. To illustrate it I’m going to use something I’ve used before but it still is a strong reference. Once when I was having a massage I just couldn’t settle down. I couldn’t let go and let someone work on me. So, this very wise massage therapist did something wonderful. She went out of the room and came back with a book in her hand. She sat at the foot of the table and began to read to me. It was soothing and profound both. It seemed at first that it was a children’s story. But it wasn’t at all. It was The Velveteen Rabbit , Or How Toys Become Real, by Margery Williams. It is all about what it is to be real. And that sometimes when we become real we have gone through things that have softened our edges, difficult times. We have become vulnerable. Something that most people avoid at all costs. But the truth is that we don’t become real without becoming vulnerable, being open and letting go of our facade. There is no way around it.
In order to let go of our facade, which will crack anyway, we have to stop worrying about being embarrassed. We have to learn how to “suck it up” and just be ourselves without apology.
None of us is or ever will be perfect. That is not a human quality. All of us have to learn and grow, if we are to be real. If we are to be fully human. During the process of becoming real we will make huge mistakes, mess up, fall apart, pick ourselves up again and just plain hang in there by the skin of our teeth. Being cool is not being real. Being on top of it all is not being real.
If you notice the people who are real never claim to be experts in anything. They know that they are constantly learning. They are very humble about their accomplishments even though we may see them as awe inspiring. Because they have gone through times when they have been brought to their knees. But they have persevered. They know they will go through that many times.
So it’s okay to screw up. It’s okay to not know. It’s okay to feel shaky. It’s okay to have no idea where you are going. It’s okay to embarrass yourself. It’s all okay because as you do all of that you are well on your way to being real. When you are real you are no longer afraid to let people see who you really are. You are also okay with your own imperfections. You can now go on to do magnificent things. Extraordinary things. Because you are no longer afraid to fail. You have a sense of your own destiny. You are that best of all things - real. And no one or no thing can every take that from you.
It always comes back go the same unavoidable thing - who you are is important and necessary to the world.
Best to you,